10th August 2015

Importance of sisterhood

Let’s take one quick second and take a cue from the international ‘it’ girl. You know the one. Unless you’ve been living under a rock you’re familiar with her catchy tunes, her grand random acts of kindness gestures + her ‘sisterhood’, and that’s what I’d like to hone in on today. Miss Girl Squad Ambassador, Taylor Swift, is on to something with this gathering together of her best gal pals. There’s something we can all learn from this escapade that’s known as her “sisterhood” or as Stylist Magazine has dubbed it her “frienaissance“. Research has linked people’s social and physiological outcomes at 50 to how much of a social butterfly they were at age 20 and the quality of their friendships at age 30. It highlighted the importance of friend-making (and keeping) at all stages of life.

Happy 4th from me, @gigihadid, @marhunt, @britmaack, @serayah and @haimtheband 🙂

A photo posted by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

So today we’re talking about why sisterhoods are an important aspect in every womanhood.

1. Support through transitions. Whether you’re changing jobs, having a child, getting married, moving house, or packing your bags and hightailing it across the big blue ocean (hand raised) – it’s crucial to have women who you can call on for support. I can’t count the number of times I’ve cried on a friend’s shoulder, laughed for hours, rang in the wee hours of the night, or took a drive around town just to get out and get something off of my chest. Involve people in your sisterhood that will know when to listen and when to speak, true friends are rare but those that ‘get it’ will know exactly how to support and when. You’ll also find that those in your sisterhood change as you walk through different stages of life, and that’s okay too. You’re circle isn’t replaced, it’s just added to. There’s room for more than one bestie.

2. Sounding board. Some women in your sisterhood will have the capacity to mentor. This is vital. You know that dream you’re praying to fruition? A mentor will be able to help turn those dreams into an action plan. Dreaming only gets you so far and then it’s up to you to do something. Find a sister who will be a sounding board for all of your genius ideas and guide you on how to turn them into a reality. Hang on to her!

3. Empower. When society is saying competition, they’re saying community. It’s important in the climate we live in to have cheerleaders who can rally behind you and spur you forward. When the naysayers are telling you, you can’t, these girls are saying ‘go and conquer’! A true sister will know, love + honour herself and then be able to fully love, honour and confidently empower you. …And you know what can happen when a gathering of women come together, walls better watch themselves because they’ll come tumbling down.

Real love. @serayah @haimtheband @lordemusic @halstonsage

A photo posted by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

4. Diversity. Good news – those in your squad don’t all have to be from the same clique. In fact, it’s a good idea if they’re not. Diversity within your friendship circle means that you’ll have different friends playing different roles and speaking from different perspectives. Celebrate this.

There’s one thing I do know for sure, adult friendships are down right hard. I took for granted those precious friends that I have because we schooled together, had countless numbers of sleepovers and walked through so many stages of life together. Then I moved and, as crazy as it sounds, I had to learn to foster friendships again. I started from scratch. It’s not that the love + compassion was lacking but, it was more that the history was absent. We hadn’t walked a journey together, they didn’t know my background and I didn’t know theirs. Years were missing and only time can begin to bridge that gap. I’ve come to discover that friendships take patience, you can’t make a best friend over night. You’ve got to build trust and invest. It’s not as convenient as striking up a conversation on the playground and voila you’ve got a friend for life. We’ve got to wade the waters and be prayerfully cautious about who we let in.

laughter and sisterhood

If you don’t have a sisterhood it’s not too late to start. Pray that God sends people into your life that you can consider a close part of your friendship circle. Focus on investing in those friends that you do have and before you know it you’ll look back with a thankful heart at how blessed you’ve been by a great group of friends, ‘sistas’.

Sister featured : Miss.Nat Box

  • Bella! I love this! You are such a precious sister… LOVE LOVE LOVED this day together in NYC… what a dream… a photoshoot in New York! 🙂 xoxo

    • Oh me too!!!! Lets make it happen again one day – k? xoxo

  • Elizabeth May Roles

    Fab post lovely. I especially like the words “prayerfully cautious”, I have an ability to trust everyone but it’s only through time & wisdom, like you say, that you know if it’s right to have that friendship in your inner circle or not. Love the photo too, NY is so fab xo

    • Yes, it’s a vital aspect isn’t it? The older + wiser we get the more we realise this 🙂

  • I don’t know what I would do with my “squad!”

  • I 100% agree it’s all about building up our fellow women in our relationships. So many of my friends are strong, independent, business women and I am always learning something from them!

    • That’s the best part of friendships, learning from each other and growing together!

  • Pamela

    I completely agree! Too many times women are competitive and pitted against each other but I think we should learn from each other and help each other. Having a great support system is definitely a necessity!
    <3, Pamela
    Sequins & Sea Breezes

    • It is most definitely a necessity! xo

  • ellen ross

    all of this is so so true!!!

    XO Ellen from Ask Away

    • Glad you agree! It’s so important yet can often be overlooked!

  • Biana Perez

    Such a great post!!! Being a girls girl is so important – there is enough things in the world trying to bring us down we shouldn’t be helping it!! xo, Biana –BlovedBoston

    • Aww thanks for stopping by! Exactly – you are so right! xo

  • Love this post! I will never understand why so many women put more energy into tearing each other down instead of building each other up. I pride myself in being a girl’s girl, it’s so empowering and you reap so many benefits from those friendships 🙂

    • You are spot on! Community over competition is the way to go!